I went in to have a look at a bicycle. The one that’s really a road bike. Really sleek and doesn’t have gears. I saw the shopkeeper was at the back so didn’t want to bother with asking any questions. I proceeded to check out the bikes but the posters also caught my attention. Of course posters at any shop aren’t unwarranted and something quite expected.
When started looking at the bone accessories I was greeted with a pleasant “Hello!”. It wasn’t the kind you get used to in Japanese malls. It was a classic greeting that almost seemed out of a classic Hollywood movie. Unnatural for a bicycle shop but stimulus enough to grab one’s attention. Perhaps it wasn’t just the greeting but also the treble in voice you ought to hear from an elderly and experienced gentlemen.
A little man came out the back and asked me what kind of a flashlight I was looking for? His appearance did justice to the tremble in his voice but not too his accent. I now had to but the accessory which I knew at the time I hadn’t entered the shop to buy in the first place. Perhaps I was sold but this guy wasn’t selling to me.
He proceeded to tell me about his passion for bikes but his voice fell flat and a tad bit less excited when he said he was a cancer survivor. He didn’t ride anymore but heck he could show me his regrown pony tail to prove that he in fact used to be a biker. Unfortunately the cancer wasn’t his only tragedy. He had lost his wife a couple of years as well. He was rejuvenated towards the end now. Bikes were all he looked forward to. Reminiscing this incident makes me realize that I was audience to his life experiences for less than 10 minutes yet he told me all this and I still remember it.
Perhaps ‘biker-man’, as I fondly recall him, had a treasure trove of stories. He was brimming with life experiences. He knew his journey would come to an end soon but he was now over his mid life crisis. He liked an audience wherever, whenever. His shop was just a vent for his passions. The bicycles were just manifestations of things he could take care of. His family was nowhere around. All he did now was steal time. Not happy, contented yet loving every moment of living. Excited about each moment that he grasped. Not worried about whether he would amount to anything and not concerned about what anyone would think about his actions. Not careless yet carefree.
It’s easy to fall prey to things we like to believe in where we are the victim.
It’s hard to imagine that we are the perpetrator of a crime or we are causing someone pain. So what’s the best thing to do? To imagine that we have been wronged. However we are quick to decide that we are wrong because we create a safety zone around ourselves by declaring that we have been wronged. So when we hear or read something that causes us discomfort even if it is only the partial story we are quick to pick it up and declare that we have been wronged. We are rarely ever ready to sit down and accept that we are causing discomfort to another one. If we do it turns into a context of who has done more wrong. That then is followed by a string of apologies.
Why don’t we have a objective conversation? We do have objective conversations most of he time. We’ve figured out how the earth moves around the sun. We’ve examined the breadth of galaxies. We’ve done all this, I’m sure we’re objective in thought, actions and speech. It’s hard explain but we’ve progressed this much in life through evolution and otherwise and yet we cant have the most basic conversations. That’s precisely the point. We can have those objective conversations outside family and what we consider home. Outside home we are building businesses, social enterprises or leading large groups of people. In those moments we are not really having a fake, protected conversation or we’re not worried about the risks. Maybe we are but we gauge the return and carry on despite the risks . We’re leading the charge and going forth considering all the risks in failure.
In personal relationships its too much to take risks. We don’t want to lose people we love. So what do we do? We become more protective about the whole relationship. That causes us to feign ignorance about attack. Even if we are not vulnerable we feel attacked at the slightest bit. We don’t want to lose people and we don’t want to lose connection. Thus we become the most fragile in front of people we care the most. Is this really fragility? No. Then one might say that it is the act to play victim? No. It’s natural tendency to pick up on the slightest cues without context. In personal relationships when something goes wrong you want to be the first one who feels attacked because you cannot be the perpetrator. You will not be the perpetrator. You have built this relationship and you are not the aggressor and you cannot accept that you are the cause for pain. So you pick up the slightest cues the other person might give or might not give. If you were ready to take risks you would accept that some things out of context seem or sound horrible. However in a personal relationship that is too much of a risk. You would rather crumble and stick to things without context. Crumbling in your opinion doesn’t break down the relationship. It only leads us to blame the other person for their “faults”. At how they are causing pain. They may or may not be but you’ll be the first one to accept that you weren’t causing the pain and the other person was the perpetrator.
The human mind is tricky but is clever to indicate that its person wasn’t the aggressor or the person who broke everything down. It might be doing that at the same time but it will not accept. Although the story doesn’t end there because will power that causes things to go the other way also originates in the human mind. There is then this tussle inside the brain. It isn’t bad but this is what makes a person whole. This thought and contemplation is what leads people to do the things they do outside home. This is what completes humans and this is the reason home is root of a balanced person. Without struggle there is nothing to conquer. Without struggle there is only defeat.
I’m going to run my first marthon today. I’ve not trained for it. I have carb-loaded for it =)
It’s a night Marathon. Let’s see how things play out. It starts 5.5 hours from now i.e. at 12.30 AM. More udpates after that!
So Prince passed away a few days ago. It was sad I think because a lot of people paid tributes to the person. Apparently the guy had a lot of influence on the world of music. I never came to appreciate his music personally. Every time I listened to him I felt like he was misplaced relic from a the ’70s. I felt like maybe that was one of the reasons people appreciated him. They missed the ’70s and they took to him because he was like a remnant of that generation.
Today however I heard purple rain. To realize that there was a guitar solo hidden in that song was a revelation. I loved the guitar solo! I couldn’t stop listening to different versions of the song. Now I’m listening to best of Prince on Apple music. I couldn’t find much of his music. Then I also realized that he was one of those people who threatened to sue YouTube for having his music online. He/ his management were also one of those who threatened Weird Al Yankovic not to create a parody of him.
Funny, I thought. He’s one of those people who is over protective about his creations and does not put it out there for people to enjoy. Well, I’m sure what I’m stating is an outrageous exaggeration. I would have however taken an instantaneous liking to the person if he’d been supportive of people putting his work out there.
There are too many hues in life to be judgemental. I have not even scratched the surface when we’re talking about variety in life. I am learning to be more broad minded everyday.
And this goes…
Having unspace just means you’re a comfortable little rascal and don’t need anyone. I doubt anyone is like that. Imagine a life where there’s no sis, no mom… I know you mean temporary unspace, but look at life it’s so little so fleeting… Where do you have the time to have unspace. Tomorrow someone will be gone and then you’ll regret it, so make the best of what you have and cherish each moment. You can collect all your need of unspace and put it in a corner. In a few years that’s all you’ll have. Noone around… But what you want is best of both worlds. You want those you’re attached around you as well and then you want your space as well. Well, it’s a bit unfair to keep wanting. But you’re justified in asking why can’t you have it. The funny fact is that you have it, you just want more. You have space when you want it and you have people around you as well. Why complain?
So it’s almost like you believe in something and you get it. Really? I don’t think that statement portrays everything. I think it’s like when you talk about a full fledged war and interpret it like a skirmish. “…They all were ambushed and killed.” Doesn’t really portray everything and gives a false picture to anyone reading it.
So I will be moving to another country. I chose a life choice instead of learning at school. This will probably cut down my options for a two year MBA. Besides the choice to move to another country the original option to continue study to learn business in the US was very expensive.
This changes a lot of things. It does not make me a rich person at all. It gives me the same what I was getting but it does give me an additional year of international exposure. For now nothing has been finalized and neither do I have a contract. Let’s see how things pan out.